E maniac de jocuri si eu sunt un pachet de nervi !

[Kalid]

de acord cu buli!!

[Guestus]

Yo zic sa ma stea cu el o perioada..cu cit EL o trateaza mai rau cu atit o sa para viata mai frumoasa dupa.

[zepellina]

quote:

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Originally posted by Guestus
Yo zic sa ma stea cu el o perioada..cu cit EL o trateaza mai rau cu atit o sa para viata mai frumoasa dupa.

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mare adevar[alcool] de ce isi pun femeile atatea intrebari la ceva evident? "Cu cit esti mai entuziasmat de viata, cu atit mai multa bucurie vei gasi in ea." zepellina

[MissParker]

Guestus are dreptate. Si psihologii zic la fel: daca inca mai rezisti, inseamna ca 1) you still get a kick out of it si 2) nu ai ajuns inca la limita suportabilului. Asa ca totul depinde de tine. Daca turbezi aici pe forum, nu rezolvi nimic. Daca-i spargi capul, nu rezolvi nimic. Si tot asa. Dar astea le stii si tu deja.

Felicia [gravi] 25+ mami under construction pentru [baietel] - David

[9cer] [url="http://community.webshots.com/user/Miss_Parker_1911"]Poze cu noi si vacantele noastre[/url]

IUBIRE > ADEVAR > AUTONOMIE > IDENTITATE

[ayleen]

mare adevar, Guestus![alcool]Da, Miss Parker, eu am simtit, pe pielea mea, cum nu mai puteam, si imi venea sa plec, sa rup, sa fug. Am si facut-o in cateva randuri, speriata de exces. Detest excesul, nu aduce nimic bun. M-am intors dupa cateva zile, o luna, speriata de singuratate si rusinata ca, poate, eu sunt de vina [cool]. Si, in loc sa pun conditii, acceptam conditii, faceam concesii...ma mai revoltam, iar mai taceam...tot asa. Spunea o fata ca ea se joaca cu prietenul ei, si mai spune "Nu exageram si nu pierdem simtul realitatii". Nu inteleg, oricat m-as stradui, ce rost are postarea ei, adica ce intentie a avut cand a scris... a vrut sa sublinieze...ce?[:-/] In acest topic este vorba de jucatul in exces, adica cu exagerare si cu pierdere partiala a simtului realitatii. Deci? Ah, cred ca trebuie sa vedem ca se poate juca acest joc si fara exagerare. Si in cuplu, tot fara exagerare. Citind povestirile oamenilor de pe site-urile pe care le-am postat o data aici, am intalnit multe, nu stiu, sute de cazuri cand jucau amandoi. In majoritatea cazurilor traiau intr-o conditie deplorabila, iar unul sfarsea prin a-l parasi pe celalalt. Din motive ca: - unul juca fara masura, iar celalalt simtea nevoia sa se opreasca, de aici cearta. - unul era indisponibil, atunci cand celalalt avea nevoie de el. - se certau din cauza jocului - a aparut un copil/doi/patru, iar jucatorul mai infocat nu ceda timp din jucatul lui pt familie - unul statea prea mult pe chat sau flirta ... Unui cuplu le-a murit baietelul nou nascut, sufocat in paturica, pt ca nu-l mai verificasera, prinsi in febra jocului. Erau niste oameni sfasiati, a caror postare m-a impresionat pana la sufocare. Marturii pline de cainta ale jucatorilor care au sfarsit parasiti de sotie si copii. Cel care juca mai infocat nu era de fiecare data barbatul era si femeia. Una i-a spus iubitului care a refuzat sa mai joace si a parasit-o: "ok, bye!", zambind![hot]. Alta l-a parasit pe barbat-su, ca sa plece la un alt gamer, cu care flirta, si care o intelegea mai bine[bang]. Daca incep sa va povestesc, ar dura trei saptamani, adica cat mi-a luat mie sa citesc. parinti innebuniti de durere, copii tristi, parteneri neglijati, codependenti, cu copii mici care plang pe langa tata, neputand sa inteleaga de ce se joaca atata! Apoi un site pe care, fiecare gamer care s-a oprit din jucat, isi povesteste motivele: este incredibil ce regrete au, si cat i-a transformat jocul. Acolo citeam si plangeam. Deci, draga membra care te joci frumusel cu sotul tau, fara sa exagerati, apoi va duceti la bucatarie, gatiti ceva bun si apoi va bagati sub paturica la tv, tinandu-va de mana seara, inseamna ca nu stii cum e sa te duci seara de seara singura la culcare. Inseamna ca nici tu, nici sotul tau nu va jucati dimineata 3 ore (inainte sa fugiti la serviciu la ora 10), de la 19 pana tarziu in noapte, zilnic, de luni pana vineri. Sambata de la 7 pana la 24, cu pauza o ora, cat dormiti sau faceti dragoste si inca doua pauze de 15 minute cat mancati. Duminica la fel. Iar luni, de la 7, acelasi program. Niciodata nu i-a reprosat partenerului: "omule, te-ai jucat sambata 14 ore, iar duminica 10 ore! Opreste-te!" Iar el sa-ti raspunda: "Dap! Si ma mai joc!!!!!!hahaaaa, ce-o sa ma mai joc!" Ok, eu recunosc ca am o tema, o trauma, dar nus` de ce jucatul amandurora ar trebui sa fie o rezolvare a situatiei... Imi pare rau, eu nu vreau sa joc acel joc. Sa-l joace el, daca-i place. Mie-mi place sa iesim in parc, el iese cu mine in parc? Nu. La revedere!

[bebe_io]

MMORPG-urile (adica Masively Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Games) sunt jocurile ce creeaza cel mai puternic dependenta. De ce? Jocurile Single-Player (in care tu esti singurul personaj) isi arata deseori si destul de repede limitarile lumii fizice in care te plaseaza jocul. Chiar si cea mai performanta Inteligenta Artificiala (AI) paleste in fata capacitatii creierului uman. Faptul ca te afli in fata unei lumi artificial si imperfect modelate (chiar si din punct de vedere grafic, uneori) te face sa nu evadezi complet in joc. Sa poti ramane detasat de el. Insa MMORPG-urile nu au drept personaje niste AI. Ci alti oameni. Care fac acele persoanje sa devina surprinzatoare, neliniare in atitudine. In jocurile single-player orice neajuns logic al strucutrii de definire a relatiilor dintre obiectele jocului este repede exploatat de catre jucator. In MMORPG orice dezechilibru logic al jocului este repede corectat in real-time pe servere de catre administratorii retelelor. Incapacitatea individului de a mai detecta ca este supus unui mediu artificial programat, supus erorilor si limitarilor de programare tinde sa dispara, iar cel ce nu a apucat sa perceapa ce este, in fapt, un joc, adica o amarata de structura logica imbracata cu weeeeeeeeeee, luminite, e usor pierdut. E cam ca la volan. Si acolo toti sunt viteji si vor sa castige si chiar reusesc. De-aia sofeaza asa imprudent. Au si ei o reusita pe ziua aia. Au sofat mai repede decat altii. Si in MMORPG-uri se castiga la fel de usor si nici macar nu trebuie sa dai banii pe benzina, deci poti sa stai on-line non-stop ca tot atata costa. Si nu-i puteti scoate cu vorba din lumea aia. Trebuie sa iasa ei singuri. Daca veti mai fi si voi acolo sau nu, asta e o alta problema. Iar tratament nu se poate oferi unuia care nu accepta ca are o problema.

[ayleen]

Am sa citez si eu o postare de pe un astfel de forum tematic. Imi cer scuze ca nu e in engleza, dar promit sa il traduc, cand voi avea timp. Re: [WOW_widow] I am new and in need of advice Based on the experiences of the ones who have been on this forum for a long time, having tried everything...... In the beginning you feel soft and vulnerable "I love him why isn't he paying any attention to me?" Then after a while, a tiny bit of anger creeps in" This isn't right! I should not be treated like this!", There is the embarrassment mode "I can't tell anyone about this! it would sound ridiculous" THen comes the various attempts to intervene - take away the physical parts of the computer - the mouse, the keyboard, the sound card, the cable for the modem,,,etc etc and this generally invites ANGER from the gamer. A sense of frustration creeps in,,,"why can't I get through to him?" then, realizing that no amount of talking or negotiating with him will improve the situation, you decide to confide in a few close friends, who, not understanding the seriousness of the addiction, just laugh it off and say, "just disconnect the internet" or some such non-helpful advice. You start to look on the internet for information about this problem. You find this group, and others. You read and read and read and you are horrified by what you read. Then you think, "well, my gamer isn't as bad as THOSE people".....but yet, .... Then more attempts to negotiate deals on playing time, etc, Deals are made, but always broken. They don't last. Gamer goes back to his old ways.... You think, "I am getting nowhere". "Why do I feel so alone?" In the first place, one of the reasons you feel alone is because you are depending on someone else to make you happy. This is a common theme here, and it takes a long time for a wow widow to realize that you have to be a whole person on your own before you can enter into any kind of partnership. People who are selfconfident and have some respect for themselves, their abilities and their place in the world would never in a million years put up with a partner like this. So then, you think, I have to start looking after me. You start to go out with friends, first it's just for coffee, then another time dinner, then another time a whole evening, then after a while a whole weekend away with friends...You think "He will notice I am gone'. He doesn't. It just gives him more time to play without being nagged at. But you continue to go out, and after a while, you begin to enjoy yourself without him. Then you think "He is a big loser and is missing out on life. He can do that if he wants, but I am going to have fun anyway. " So you end up leading separate lives, in a way, because he will not go to weddings, parties, out for dinner with friends, or anywhere socially that you might consider normal. If you do get him to go out, he will demand that he has to be back for an important "raid" and insists on leaving before the event has come to an end. You feel cheated. You begin to think "is there something wrong with me? am I too fat? and I just a nag now?" So you carry on living life on your own, and begin to wonder just why do you have him in your life. You remember when he was fun, and you think "If only he could just be who he used to be!" or,,"The real him is under there somewhere!" Slowly it dawns on you "he must have a problem. He is depressed or something" You ask him to go see a doctor or therapist or somebody. He won't. He will not admit to having a problem. It is just a hobby, he says. You start to get sarcastic "Some hobby! " you say. "I'd like to have 16 hours a day to spend on my hobby!" Anger returns. He won't cooperate at all. You start to wonder if it's all worth it. You start making plans to leave. You wonder what you are doing there, and why it took you so long to see that he just doesn't love you anymore. He loves his game more. He finds out you are thinking about leaving,. He makes an effort. He plays a bit less. You have second thoughts. You stay. Everything goes back to the way it was. Love for this person starts to fade. I cant do this anymore. If you don't have kids you think "How could I have kids with this person? what kind of father would he be? " If you have kids, you think "The kids are suffering because he is ignoring them. It's OK for me, but NOT THE KIDS!" What should I do?????" ********************************** Is this where you are right now? Looking at the situations where some success has been had, these are the only approaches that have worked. 1. In the files section of the WOW widows website is an article from a former gamer who wrote about his addiction and how it was destroying him. One woman left his article on the computer screen so her gamer could read it. He responded by deciding to quit playing the game. There is, however, no guarantee that this will work with your gamer. 2. Separate. Do not live together. Take a stand, and say, it's the game or me. Leave. Tell him, " I will not return until the game is gone. If you take too long, I may not return at all." Then actually pack up and leave. Nothing short of that gets their attention. RIck and Leigh, who write on this forum, will tell you that, while that approach worked for them, it took Leigh, who was the gamer in that situation, 4 months to realize what what going on. If you say, Oh, I couldn't do that, then you are actually enabling the gamer. As long as the gamer has you and the game under the same roof, the gamer continues to believe that things are OK. Sometimes they notice things are a little rocky, but do not acknowlege that there is a big problem. So, you said " I am new" so I thought I would give the new people a little summary, so it doesn't take them so long to realize that your continued presence is part of the problem. Sorry this is so long. THere is a lot more that could be said.

[ayleen]

Si, macar ca o curiozitate a naturii, va redau si o marturie a unui barbat care a jucat mult, si care a pierdut tot. este doar unul, dar eu STIU ca sunt ca el multi. I lost everything in my life, because of this game... I don't know where to begin my story, I am nearly crying as I write this, so anyways, I'm going to write my personal story that happened to me in hopes to help some of you out there who have an EQ addiction a chance to get out of it before it get's to late... Before EverQuest I used to have nearly a perfect life, I was living the american dream if you will. I hade a wonderfull job, a great house, a beautiful and lovely wife and most importanly my 2 beautiful little girls wich I love dearly....now I've lost everything because of this game. It all started out about 2 and a half years ago, when I went to Electronics Boutique to purchased the game EverQuest. I had read so much about it in magazines and on the web. It all sounded so good, that I just HAD to buy it since I was such a big RPG fan. When I got to Electronic Boutique the clerk saw me looking in the RPG section and I had just picked up EverQuest off the shelves, he said to me " EQ huh? I can assure you sir that's a really cool game, I have loads of fun myself playing it when I get home from work" wich just urged me even more into buying it. So finnaly I bought it and when I got home I installed it on my computer, got my credit card to subscribed and whitin seconds I was in the game playing. It all was good at first nothing ever seemed to suggest that this was an "addicting" game (boy was I ever wrong...). I made many friends during the first week that I played got myself some decent equipment and wepons, and I was just generaly having a good time playing and getting away from some RL stress... A few weeks past or mabe a month or so, and I started playing more and more. As my character got higher in level's it became more demanding for me to stay longer hours online to play and unconsciously I started ignoring my RL. This is where my story really begins... You see me and my wife used to be really close to each other, I used to come home from work and eat a wonderfull meal cooked by my wife, I don't want to sound like I'm bragging here but, my wife was a great cook. We would eat together and talk about both our days at work. Then I would usually spend some time with my 2 girls since I was at work most of the week and the only time I got to spend some time with them was in the evening. I would usually take them both in my arms and put a book in-between us and read them a story. On other nights we would play with one of the big ballons that we had, throwing it around, oh how I miss those days! After we'd put the kids in bed me and my wife would smooch on the couch a little bit while watching TV or just chatting. There is so much more things that I miss, such as going out with my wife to restaurants, or going together as a family to the movies and other social activities that we used to do together as a family. This all changed when I started getting "addicted" to EQ. I would come home from work eat my dinner really fast, say a few words to my wife and kids and I would litterally rush myself to the computer room. I would then proceed to load up EQ, check up on how everyone in my guild was doing and see if there was any special event going on such as a raid or something. You see the time that I would have normally spend in the evening with my daughters playing got replaced by EQ playing instead. I started to ignore my wife, ALOT, and sadly, my 2 daughters even more. Many times I would forget to eat and drink because I was so consumed with this game. Sometimes I had to go to the bathroom but I didn't want to get up because most of the time it was in the middle of a tough fight and I just couldn't leave my computer because the thought of even dying in this game is scary, the penalty for it is quite severe. So I decided to set up a little pot in my computer room so I wouldn't have to get up when I needed to go pee, as much as this may sound ubelivable I can assure you it's the truth. Many times I would stay up all night till 2-3am in the morning playing because in my mind it was really important to do planar and dragon raids with my guild, and not only that I had to get up in the morning to go to work. Some times my wife would tell me to go to bed with her but I was so consummed with the game that I would usualy reply to her that I was on a corpse run or that we had just gotten a good group or a guild mate of mine needed help on a quest etc... There are lot's of time I can recall when I called in sick at work because I had stayed up late the night before and just couldn't get up to go to work. There are also times when I called in sick because there was a guild raid that I wanted to attend because there were some good items to be had that I wanted for my character. When I actually went work on weekdays I was always grumpy, I couldn't think as clearly or act properly like I normally did before EverQuest, I couldn't stop thinking about it and talking about it to my co-workers. wich got them concerned... I eventually got fired, the boss was feed up with me missing all the time and not doing my job the way I was supposed to. When I tried to explained this to my wife that I had lost my job she was really upset since I was the only one who provided income for our family. We got into a really big argument and she didn't know what we were gonna do for money and to be honest neither did I. I search everywhere for a job, I even went back in to my old workplace and litterally begged my manager to give me my old job back...but it was too late he had alredy replaced me with somebody else. We enventually fell on wellfare while I was on my job hunt, but I gotta admit I didn't search very long mabe a week at the very most 2 weeks, after a while I was so depressed that I just began to loose interrest in finding a better job. I didn't care to find work anymore, all I cared about was playing my game. At this point my wife started to become VERY concerned with me, and she came over to talk to me about it while I was on the computer. We got into a big argument and I said some mean things to her that I know now, looking back at it today, that I shouldn't have said at that time. She decided to move over to her father and mother's house wich was about half an hour drive from our house and she also took our 2 girls with her. I didn't care really since I thought to myself "Great! I'll be alone, finally!". I guess I didn't really think that she would be going for REAL and thought to myself that she would come back after a while. The first week that my wife had left, I stayed up all day and night playing EQ, eating whatever we had left in the house, I didn't even bother calling them, I didn't care either. I had totally lost sight of reality, all that mattered to me was playing the game. I didn't even bother to brush my theeth in the morning nor did I take a bath or shower, much less shave. I didn't do my laundry and never wore clean cloths. Most of the time I would keep on the same cloths that I had sleept in and wore the day before. I didn't clean my house either and dirty dishes were all over the place and I almost never took out the trash. I would order food from one of my local restaurants for supper and sometimes would eat the leftovers for breakfast. I would sit in front of the computer for hours on end all day long and play the game, it didn't matter to me, the only life I knew of was the life of EverQuest. I then met a girl in the game, I was so in love with her that I was up to a point where I had totally forgot about my RL wife and my RL in general, that I began living this "virtural" life if you will. I proceeded a few weeks later to ask my "virtural girlfriend" to marry me in game, she agreed. We

[iepumic]

Dahriana, eu am trecut EXACT EXACT EXACT prin ce treci tu acum. 3 luni de zile m-am chinuit, crezand ca ori ajung la nebuni, ori la racoare (ca mai aveam putin si-l killaream). N-am ajuns nici colo, nici colo, am aplicat metoda CUI PE CUI se scoate...desi nici mie nu imi place deloc sa ma joc pe computer (stau destul cu nasul in monitor la servici)...ajunsesem de jucam mai mult decat si neavand decat un singur computer a trebuit sa mai luam unul si ne jucam in paralel.....pe mine ma mana ura fata de respectivul joc si ambitia de a-i arata ca se poate si invers.....pana la urma a dat rezultate pentru ca si-a dat seama ca se alege praful de tot. Inca este un subiect sensibil intre noi...dar acum nu se mai joaca si sunt 3 ani de atunci. Da, se mai joaca cate jumatate de ora seara sau cateva seri la rand foarte rar...dar FOARTE RAR. Nu mai este dependenta, nu mai refuza sa iasa din casa pe motiv ca se joaca si alte d-astea. DAR.....concluzia mea este ca: nu este joc pe computer, este altceva. Barbatii au "micile" lor placeri-obsesii fara de care nu pot trai.....acum la sotul meu este bowlingul (si ma bucur ca este asta pt ca e un joc de societate si jucam impreuna, deci nu este in detrimentul relatiei.....decat atunci cand sare calul si sta cu zilele la sala!), la tatal si fratele meu sunt meciurile de fotbal, pt altii cantatul la chitara, pt altii statul la bere....nu conteaza ce e, dar in majoritatea cazurilor exista o astfel de dependenta fata de o activitate de relaxare. Daca poti reusi sa-l faci pe prietenul tau sa renunte la jucat, nu-ti pot spune pt ca asta depinde f mult de firea lui si mai putin de tine (dar si de tine!)...insa trebuie sa fii pregatita sa ai surprize apoi: va aparea in timp altceav, alta pasiune, hobby, alta mica obsesie, temporara sau nu.....trebuie sa iti dai seama daca esti pregatita sa lupti toata viata sa schimbi un om care are alte prioritati si devine asa de usor dependent de niste chestii. Cat despre raspunsurile pe care ti le-a dat (ca-si cauta alta prietena pe net etc.).....cate certuri am avut eu pt. raspunsuri din astea....nici nu zic....dar nu sunt ceva nou pt mine cand citesc. Concluziile le tragi tu, deciziile tot tu le iei...eu iti doresc doar sa nu-ti irosesti tineretea aiurea....ca zau ca-i numai una si e SCURTA. Iepumic [iepu] [url="http://good-times.webshots.com/album/561858199FIToTi"]Noi pozici cu Iepi-Mici[/url] [url="http://family.webshots.com/album/560575706QeorwD"]CONCEDIU 2007[/url] All's Well That Ends Well.

[Dahriana]

iepumic,sincera sa fiu,nu ma pot apuca de jocul ala.Pur si simplu ma oboseste.Sunt atatea lumini,zgomote.Aia numa relaxare nu se poate numi pt mine. Prefer sa ma duc la un lac si sa arunc pietre in apa.Asa ma relaxaz eu. Nu stiu,avem forme diferite de a percepe lucrurile. Si el la fel face cu maniile.Face o manie din orice lucru nou descoperit.Intr-un timp se uita incontinuu la box,apoi s-a apucat de descarcat muzica,dar descarca in nestire si umplea hardurile! Nu o asculta niciodata. Mai apoi s-a apucat de cumparat calculatoare..si orice piesa vedea pt calculator,o vroia si el. Eu nu inteleg oamenii astia haotici.